Category Archives: things i’ve learnt this week

things i’ve learnt this week / 10

Mothers experience unnecessary guilt.
Recently I accepted a new job with a new company that
 will have me returning to work 3+ months before 
my maternity leave is scheduled to end.
I can’t tell you how excited I am for this great opportunity and
despite me knowing I made the right decision
I can’t help but feel a little guilty that I am “leaving” Luca early.
I hate to admit this, but I feel that guilt every so often, 
mainly when we go someplace without him –
(which we don’t do often for that reason alone).
In my heart I know that being a good mother means
 being the best person I can be in and outside the home.
I mean what would make a child more proud than
 a successful and happy parent?

A little encouragement goes a long way.
I am always humbled when a reader makes
 a kind comment about my blog or seeks my advice
 on a piece they are writing.
I can’t help but think back to a time when
 I was scared to share my writing –
 so you can imagine how great of a feeling it is 
when I am able to connect with my audience in a positive way.
I also sincerely feel the same great feeling when I encourage others.
Whether it be a family member, friend or a mere acquaintance –
we shouldn’t hesitate to let them know that
 we appreciate what they are doing.
There is no greater satisfaction for our creative selves 🙂

Don’t save the “good stuff” for tomorrow.
I never quite understood the point of storing “the good china” 
in a cabinet to collect dust or
having a fully furnished room in your home that is just for show.
So when I stumbled across a few pieces of clothing in my closet
that I was saving for a “special occasion”,
not only did I feel like a hypocrite, but extremely silly as well.
We work hard every single day for the luxuries we have –
whether it be an expensive dish set, clothes or other things
we spoil ourselves with from time to time.
And while these are just things and certainly not what life is about
there is no reason why today isn’t as good as any to enjoy them.
After all, we deserve it.

xo N

Photos: via

things i’ve learnt this week / 09

I may be more of a crybaby than my infant son.
Saturday night marked the third time (in seven months)
 that Luca spent the night away from us.
It also marked the third time I cried so hard, 
you would have thought someone had died if you saw me.
Never did I think I would be that crazy emotional –
especially when he is in the safe care of his grandparents.
It’s amazing this thing they call motherhood..
one minute you are dying for just a moment to yourself 
and when you get an entire night, you can’t even enjoy it!
Some of the greatest opportunities come
 with the greatest sacrifice.
It can make for a very tough decision at times.
Over the years I’ve become better at
 focusing on the first part, rather than the latter.
Because in the end, the sacrifice is usually minuscule compared to 
where the opportunity will take you.

Relationships are forever evolving.  This is a good thing.
Recently Charlie and I found some old videos of us
 I’d taken with my phone when we first started going out.
They were short and extremely silly but boy
could you see the young love in our eyes.
For a second I felt a little sad watching them.
I remembered that feeling you get when you first start dating
someone you really like. 
So wonderfully consuming. 
And then I started to think about the
 past five years we’ve spent together.
The challenges. The triumphs. 
The kind of love we’ve been blessed with.
Our relationship may evolve, but the love remains constant.
And there is nothing sad about that 🙂

Previous thing’s I’ve learnt.

xo N

Photos: via

things i’ve learnt this week / 08

There is no larger time waster than tv.
A few weeks back, husband and I caught ourselves watching a
marathon of Storage Wars for longer than we’d like to admit.
It’s not like we seek out ways to waste our time –
especially now that the majority of our time is dedicated to baby.
 Our modest sized apartment is filled with books –
books we are dying start and books we long to re-visit.
So, recently we cut our cable down to basic.
(which isn’t really that basic, in my opinion)
Since doing so, the only time we find ourselves in front of our tv 
is to either watch a film or one of the few shows we pvr.
Feels amazing!
There is never a bad time to go back to school.
Leave it to me to finally decide to go back to school 
after I have a baby.
But so what, right?  People do it everyday and they do it very well.
I’m so excited to get back into the classroom..
to challenge my passion, 
grow it,
and share it in ways I’ve always aspired to.

One of my favorite writers, Pia Jane Bijkerk, recently wrote:
If there is one way to be sure you are living in the moment, have a baby.”
Oh how true.
It’s more than just the loss of routine or the zillion other variables
 having a little one brings to your life.
It’s the result of those variables.
Being more present.  More focused.
And for me, much more relaxed.
Moments that slip into hours of pure silliness.
Pure joy.
Those are the moments that put 
everything into perspective for me.

xo N

things i’ve learnt this week / 07

I need to carve out a little more “me” time.
I realized this a few nights ago as I was forcing myself
to stay awake despite the fact that it was close to 2am.
I was exhausted and as all new moms can relate, needed to sleep
but I really wanted time to myself.
 Just me. In silence. Doing nothing important.

I’m aware there are mothers out there that go months,
even years without taking a second for themselves.
And while my hat goes off to them for being so unselfish,
I have to admit, I feel very unbalanced (and a bit crazy)
 without a few moments of idle time to myself.
And so, my goal is to take a couple of hours, once a week
 to just be.
I’m confident I will be a better mother for it.

A little compassion goes a long way.
I am reading The Art of Happiness for the first time and
it’s inspired me to practice compassion in ways I never thought to.
Only positive things have come from doing so –
not only am I seeing things from a
 fresh (and more positive) perspective
but I am experiencing a deeper connection 
with others and within myself.
Babies bring people together.
A dear friend of mine wrote those exact words to me
a few weeks before Luca was born.
I was going through some stuff at the time and
reading that made my heart swell with hope.
Babies really do bring people together –
strangers, friends, family.. 
whether you were close to begin with or not.
They reminds us how amazing this gift called life is.
They remind us to celebrate it and each other

xo N

things i’ve learnt this week / 06

I love my body more post baby.
I realize this may be a surprising statement to some 
but I have a feeling that there are many mothers out there
who share this same feeling.
I had never been more in tune with my body than during
 those precious nine months of pregnancy
{Side note: I loved being pregnant!}
The entire experience made me appreciate
 – among other things –
the gift of good health.
Since becoming a mother,
I’ve become more committed than ever to staying healthy.
 And while I’ve always made a conscious effort to eat healthy, 
 for the first time in years
I’ve successfully integrated exercise into my daily routine.
It’s quite a wonderful feeling to be able to
 fit comfortably back into your pre-pregnancy clothes
but at the end of the day,
it’s how I feel inside
that is making me the happiest of all.

Friends are meant to come and go in life.
It is always sad when you lose touch with a good friend.
For some reason or another distance has taken form –
sometimes it can be fueled by words, other times by silence.
Most of the time it’s as simple as
 two people embarking on different paths,
no longer sharing common ground.
Change is happening to each of us,
in different ways, every day.
And while it’s sad to grow apart from those once considered dear,
these shifts will almost always bring new friends into your life –
friends who are on a similar journey, 
friends that you can learn from and grow with.
Just as you did with the ones before them.
Because in the end,
 it’s not so much about how long a person was in your life for, 
but rather the impact they made while they were there.

xo N

things i’ve learnt this week / 05

I’ve never been more excited for
 the holidays than this year.
I love this time of year.  I always have.
Between the delicious feasts, 
quality time with loved ones and holiday traditions
it’s such a fun and eventful time.
I’m especially excited as this year will be Luca’s first Christmas.
And while he may be too young to appreciate
 things like treats and gifts 
the spirit of it all will surely be felt by
 the immense love that surrounds him.

Long walks are good for the soul.
One of my favorite things to do is to
take long walks around the city.
Living in the downtown core, I am in walking distance to
many staples of the city..
 the central library, the art galleryStanley Park and the beach.
It’s wonderful to have so much
 nature and culture close to home.
Also, a long walk is the perfect way to soothe little baby,
get mama some exercise and enjoy the
 beautiful backdrop that is Vancouver –
all at the same time.

It’s ok if I’m not exactly the same the person I was
before I became a mother.
I’ve spent the better part of the last two months
 not only learning about being a mother but
convincing myself that I can be one while
living at the same speed I was before baby.
Slowly (but surely) I am accepting that there will be days where
I am able to function at full capacity but
there will also be days where all I can do is
cuddle my baby boy and nothing else. 
And really, that is wonderful in itself.

xo N

things i’ve learnt this week.

Time is valuable.
Having a baby has really opened my eyes
 as to how precious time is.
Like all new moms, I am transitioning from 
having all hours of the day dedicated to myself 
to all hours of the day dedicated to baby.
When your “me” time becomes somewhat limited
you become more aware and selective about
 how you are spending it.
In those first few days of having Luca home
I felt as though I would never have
 time for anything ever again! {overwhelmed much?}
However, as each day passes,
 I am learning that it isn’t so much about finding the time
as it is about being mindful of how your time is being used.

It’s ok to accept help.
When you’ve been self-sufficient all of your life
and are suddenly in a position where 
you can’t do everything all at once
asking for help or even accepting help can prove to be difficult.
The fact of the matter is
people don’t usually offer their assistance unless
they genuinely want to help and
 accepting help doesn’t make you any less capable.
Allow yourself to be cared for..
it will only strengthen your ability to care for the ones you love.

Trust your instincts.
We hear this all the time and know we should
yet too often we struggle in doing so.
There is so much external noise around us –
and although people usually mean well
what was “right” for them won’t necessarily be
 what is right for you.
  Trust yourself and be confident with your decision
because only you can know what is right for you.

xo N